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Wednesday, June 10

My dime; The birds told me to wait on you!


Not sure why this post has so many errors outside of being targeted and them messing with my posts. I've tried correcting and hit save. It was a waste of time. everything stayed the same and it's more than frustrating! I pray you can overlook the errors. 

Introduction: 

This may be pretty nerdy to most people. But, for me it's a really important aspect of my life. I'm one of those whose never had any confidence in what I do. I"ve always questioned everything. For instance, after I was reconciled to the Lord God -through my faith in Christ Jesus- I questioned if I was really hearing the voice of the Lord. In the beginning, I didn't know what I was hearing, or that I was even hearing anything. I just knew that I inherently knew to follow the voice of God. Yet, I didn't always listen.  
As it's written; John 10:27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me
I've always known he was guiding me. And it's written all good and bad come from him. But, doubt would always creep in and make me question if what I was hearing was from God himself and not from me. 

Current day thoughts:

I felt the need to document what the dime means to me (cause it's very important to my testimony). So important to my testimony that I believe anyone who really knows me can probably tell you something about "my dime". I can't help but sharing with any and everyone this awesome testimony. 

Although, when it first came up in life, I wasn't happy by any means. I was confused, frustrated, lonely, tired, and absolutely treacherous. Sadly, I was scared of myself for many reasons. Because I'm always spilling my guts about everything I won't get into all that today.



I'm going to use this post to talk about why this dime is important to me. And why I'm always pointing out (or saying) I've found my dime. 





The video here is on one occasion when I was walking down the street, and talking on the phone, feeling a bit leery about being out in public at night. Cause I'd stopped doing these things years prior. Thanks to the rogue government who has made me a target.

At this point, I was tired of being scared and being made to miss out on different aspects of life by those who were employed to make my life miserable. Having learned the truth of scriptures made me feel like I had no faith when I just chose to hide inside. On this day allowing them to control me through the measures they take against me wasn't an option. I'd decided to not let what they do control what I do. I was somewhat feeling liberated (instead of being afraid) and could feel I was learning something knew that I'd needed to benefit me in my walk with Christ. It just so happens I'd found a dime and documented it. That was a good day. But, also about 5 years after I'd found my first dime that established what the dime means to me.


Scripture covers everything:

When I first found my first dime many things were going on. Actually, far to many for any one post. But, part of what was going on is really important to the meaning of this dime. So, I\"d like to explain what I now understand as to be the situation from a biblical perspective. 

I didn't quite understand then-the way that I do now- what was happening in my life. I can however recall feeling helpless, lost, and pretty much like everything was out of my control. I also recall a moment where I felt in my spirit the Lord God was trying to show me something, and as I sat in the mirror looking at myself (hating everything about myself) I said, "Whatever it is your trying to show me I will go and do what it takes to learn." 

I felt in my heart that the Lord was directing me through some unknown aspects of life, and now that I read and comprehend scripture better than ever before, I can share with scripture what was taking place.  

In the 30th chapter of Jeremiah I find a huge aspect of myself. Let's read what this says --cause in a weird and supernaturally charged way-- the Prophet Jeremiah pretty much puts me in a box. (Kinda interesting I have a grandson named Jeremiah too). 
Therefore fear thou not, O my servant Jacob, saith the Lord; neither be dismayed, O Israel: for, lo, I will save thee from afar, and thy seed from the land of their captivity; and Jacob shall return, and shall be in rest, and be quiet, and none shall make him afraid. 

There is absolute reason why this scripture applies to  me. I am a part of Israel and in other posts there's more in depth understanding of who Israel is by the Prophet Jonathan Kleck. 
11 For I am with thee, saith the Lord, to save thee: though I make a full end of all nations whither I have scattered thee, yet I will not make a full end of thee: but I will correct thee in measure, and will not leave thee altogether unpunished.

I've been corrected in great measure and know what my punishment is for things done while I was out in the wilderness. Hence, the reasons I talk about it often on this blog (and on my Youtube channel). In hopes to help someone else who may be going through same things. (I've seen almost everything possible and been through real hell on earth). 
12 For thus saith the Lord, Thy bruise is incurable, and thy wound is grievous.
My bruise has been incurable for many years and my wounds were grievous to the point I was limited in anything that I could do.  
13 There is none to plead thy cause, that thou mayest be bound up: thou hast no healing medicines.
As a targeted individual doctors have never helped me. For instance, I kept getting an infection for years that would hospitalize me. But, when I would notice something wrong, I\"d go to doctor and get tested. Only to hear nothing was wrong. Each time; I ended up hospitalized. Once, they told me I wouldn\"t make it out of the hospital. Yes, I was told in 2007 that I would die from a sickness that kept me going to the doctor monthly. (I explain that in other posts) Point here is: at one point I had no one, and nothing to help me, so I told God I wouldn\"t go to the doctor again. I said, "either you will heal me or I will die cause I\"m not going back".----he has been healing me----
14 All thy lovers have forgotten thee; they seek thee not; for I have wounded thee with the wound of an enemy, with the chastisement of a cruel one, for the multitude of thine iniquity; because thy sins were increased.
Not that I care about reconciliation with ex lovers. But, there was a time I couldn\"t pay them to leave me alone. Now... That\"s a different story also making this aspect of the scripture applicable to my situation.
15 Why criest thou for thine affliction? thy sorrow is incurable for the multitude of thine iniquity: because thy sins were increased, I have done these things unto thee.16 Therefore all they that devour thee shall be devoured; and all thine adversaries, every one of them, shall go into captivity; and they that spoil thee shall be a spoil, and all that prey upon thee will I give for a prey.

I've cried so many tears for the affliction I've endured. They've tried killing me for the sins I committed. But, he told me to tell my testimony so that I may overcome by my faith in the blood of the lamb and the word of my testimony.
17 For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the Lord; because they called thee an Outcast, saying, This is Zion, whom no man seeks after.

Since childhood I've been an outcast. No matter how good I was living- or even how bad- I was always an outcast. This used to hurt me so much to my core. Even in my childhood years I encountered those who are racist and would call me all sorts of names for being Hispanic (went to a school where all white people were absolutely racist towards anyone who wasn't like them).  

More about me:


It's one of the many reasons why my sin was increased. I figured if the world hates me, and I can't be accepted by anyone, than I should die. I wanted death in so many ways to end my misery. Life was hectic, and I didn't understand why the world was against me. It was a very trying time in life. It's also when it became plain as day how much I hated myself. 

Yes, I hear God's voice. In fact, he speaks to me openly. I can hear him speak on many things. There are those times he doesn't answer me right away. But, he always responds at the right time. It's an everyday part of life for me. There's the occasional times where I feel I could have done better. However, the Lord God was in control of every aspect of my life, to him be the glory, just as it's written; 
Romans 8:28 
“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”
At one point I'd been in the dark about so very many aspects of life and of course I didn't know I was in the dark about anything. You ask me I'd known it all. And what I didn't know wasn't much (a very bad trait I'd to leave behind me). Now I know this way of thinking is for fools. But, this hasn't always been the case. It took the Lord of Hosts to teach me how wrong this was so that I may leave it behind me.

Just before finding my first dime:

In 2007 I almost died. I spent the next few years trying to fix everything that was neglected and went wrong during that time. I thought things were looking up and I\"d found myself in love in 2010. I'd felt as if I'd met the man of my dreams. He wasn't the best looking guy. However, he was literally everything I ever needed or wanted in a man. We hit it off real well in the beginning. He seemed to understand me and I felt I understood him. But, something quickly changed between him and I. And, as strange as this sounds, it didn't have anything to do with what either one of us was doing. I now know this was in fact happening because of being a targeted individual. 



During this time I didn't know this group of people existed. I thought I was alone in everything. Seriously felt like a curse was placed on me. There was even a time I found a voodoo doll in the yard of the house I lived in. This house just so happened to belong to the man I loved. We wasn't doing so well -at the time- cause, I wasn't doing so well. He had broke it off some time after I started using cocaine fairly heavily. Reasons for using the drugs stemmed from measures taken to destroy my life. 

As I said earlier, I wanted death at some point in my life, and I just couldn't seem to die. Everything was going wrong. And all of it was out of my control. I could do nothing right. No matter how hard I tried. So, I moved to destroying everything and everyone I possibly could. I thought what the hell do I have to lose when I've already lost it all? 

This mentality followed me and shaped many of my decisions. These decisions left me feeling even more hopeless. My iniquity had run so deep it come a point where I shattered my ankle running from a gunman. 

However, God's voice never went completely silent. I knew where he wanted me. Didn't always know why. Yet, I knew inherently I wasn't alone. Except for this one moment that frustration began to take over. Feelings of despair grasp my inner being and I was left with the need to hear clearly if I was crazy or not.

Walking down the street I'm speaking openly with God. Asking questions like "am I really hearing your voice?" speaking different reasons as to why I need to know...

And this is when things not only get weird. They became real. Again, I was walking and talking to the Lord and just really needing some comfort. I ask, "how do I know your speaking to me and I'm not just going nuts?" and there I found a dime on the ground. 

What happened next will blow ya mind (or least it blew mine). There was a man I'd seen many a days on the beach who barely ever spoke. He was sitting on a bench with his head tilted backwards as if he was sleeping/napping. As I was beginning to cross his path and walk past him his head pops up and he starts yelling "GOD IS REAL... GOD IS ALIVE" and his head falls back. It was like a scene out of the exorcist. Feeling a bit nutty I kept walking forward and came to a laundry mat that I would sometimes sit and talk to others at. Upon arriving. A young man (I would often see at the Rose center homeless shelter in Venice, California) says... "It's about time you showed up"


I'm a little confused. So, I ask, "did we have plans or something that I forgot about?" His response is, "No! The birds told me to wait on you." 

I'd have felt completely insane had the Lord not just reminded me of a scripture I read in jail once. "be careful of what you say even little birdies carry information"

He proceeded to tell me he found something and God told him to give it to me. I took a seat and he pulls out this sterling silver bracelet that has three hearts on it. The first heart was like a wire heart that was hollow. The second was the same just a bit thicker around the edges. And the third heart was solid. You could place a photo in the center of it. He tells me to turn it over because it has a message on the backside.

And what I read blew my mind. It said, I'VE TOLD YOU THIS BEFORE BUT I BELIEVE YOU NEEDED A REMINDER I WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU.

Now, this only means something to me because I met the Messiah the night I was baptized and he told me something that night. 

I tell that testimony in another post. Cause it's a story of its own. What he told me that night was written on the back of that bracelet. 

I WILL ALWAYS BE WITH YOU

This is what happened to make the dime such an important aspect of how the Lord speaks to me. Essentially the dime means, I'm in the right place at the right time, have no doubt, trust God, and that he is always with me!

He is with you right now as you read through this long and boring testimony. He brought you here because he has always been with you and he is calling you to humble yourself, seek his face, and be still. Put your trust in him today. Our time is short and the coming of our Lord and Savior is at the door. He will take vengeance on the unrepentant and unbelieving his mercy on the world does eventually run out. Please don't let his calling on your life at this moment be in vain. He died with YOU IN MIND. 

Much Love and Many blessings


Thank you for reading