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Thursday, March 9

My dime

Don't ask me why. But I am always having to come back and correct mistakes. Every post I make seems to have a lot of mistakes.  Mistakes I double-checked for (previous to posting). I've even gone as far as taking screenshots. To double-check my sanity. I've a video and a whole post dedicated to showing someone on my device. They will somehow seem to be mysteriously altered, and not by me, so if you see typos in these posts.  
I sure don't know what to say. Seems I can't get these people to stop playing with me. #TreasonousContractors2stalk


There's never really been anything simple about me. Since I've walked alone for the most part most of my life - and it's been supernatural -  many times I've retreated to a safe place that I can call Carmen's world. It's a place of no judgement. Where me and God talk and people's opinion make no difference. A safe place in my head, where no one can hit me with their perspectives, objectives, and falsehoods that anger me (with a righteous anger) so much. 

I desire righteous living. 

People have told me. I have multiple personalities. I say I have mood swings. So, in a sense, I look at it quite the same. 

Yet still vastly different. Here is why.

Nothing is cut and dry or black and white for me. When one side of me still wants to dine in fancy restaurants and drink expensive wines. I refrain. I think. Don't do that. It's the old me. I am a new Creation in Christ. That should keep me from doing that which I've always done. 

There are times I am finding myself wishing for a life of ease or even a life of carelessly living. But lasciviousness is a sin and there is only one chance to do the right thing as a servant. 

Keeping this in mind. 

The older I get. The more I abhor specific things. For instance, I'm not into gossip at all. Whereas, when I was a teen. I'd entertained it.

Up until now. My blog posts have been centered on one main aspect. My relationship with Christ. There are many topics touched on within all the different posts. However, the direct link (GOD) is one of many intricate parts. essentially fused together all forming a foundation set on a rock. These posts convey all the different scenarios that help people to get a better idea of what is important to me, what I like, and don't like, and so on. Within them people can easily derive the fact that I like to keep myself within what the scriptures say (to the best of my ability). 

As complicated as it may all seem. It's really relatively easy to understand. That is when it's me thinking about it. As for anyone else, I can't say if I'm able to fully write a comprehensible POV. Cause nothing is cut and dry in a supernatural world where everyone says the supernatural is only in the movies. They call good bad and bad good. No way can I expect them to understand me. This means, not everyone will understand me. And I'm fine with that.

People will always have something negative to say about me. They want to project the way they feel onto me. When I was younger. I would let that persuade me. Not anymore. 

I can confidently say. over the last few days I've found my dime. One on the ground. One on a garage floor. Another at my feet in the car. Every time I question a point in life. They appear. Well, oddly they always appear in areas where I am completely disgusted with the sort of sin around me, and I'm wondering, am I doing the right thing? Am I doing what YOU (God) want me to do?

Lately, for instance, is a bunch of gossipers. 

It's making me feel quite distant from people. Not so happy feeling. I don't exactly know how to handle it. Outside of the fact that I feel I am charged to reprove them using the Word of God. I mean, I tell them. I don't care about other people's lives to talk about them and I share the scriptures as to why. 

Leviticus 19:16 - Thou shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour: I am the LORD.

They will continue despite how I feel. That's fine. But should I entertain it when it bothers me? NO!

Then I'm called judgemental and thrown under the bus as being the one who causes problems.  The irony of it all. 

Every time  I bring up the right thing to do. It's as if Satan himself manifests around me. It's freaking weird.

It shouldn't be though.  After all, Messiah gave Peter the keys to heaven and then turned around and said. "Get behind me satan" while talking to him.

 23 But Jesus turned and said to Peter, “Get behind Me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to Me. For you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men.” Matthew 16:23

Proverbs 10

9 He who walks in integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will be found out. 10 He who winks the eye causes grief, and foolish lips will come to ruin. 11 The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.…

I can see spirits in people; going into people and leaving them. 
I can sense their presence. 
There was a time when smelling them was how I noticed they were around. Lately, in public, they've been winking. Some time ago, I witnessed a lady's head spin 360 around her neck. Another lady was talking some weird -sounded drunk or delusional - language and I could hear her babble in English as she babbled in that foreign tongue. I couldn't believe it was happening. I felt like something else was going on. 

Well, back to these people around me. Gossipping when I explicitly tell them what the scriptures say about it and say I'd rather not do that. Instead of being a split personality. Where one day, I allow them to do all that rambling for nothing. Then the next. I'm like. Stop talking!  Isn't it fair to say I'm either in agreement with or against what's around me immediately? 
All the time?

Like, you wanna talk about people? Fine. I don't.

If you can't stop while in conversations with me. I will refrain from your company. Here is why:
Ephesians 4:29 - Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

 (((Oh, although, when it's family or roommates you can't be out of their presence for long. That makes it harder.))) Anyhow, If I'm agreeing with the wrong communication. I've got to answer to that. In turn, I'm unhappy because I haven't done right by God Almighty and vice versa. To show such. By telling someone where they are wrong. It doesn't mean I've got two people in me. It simply means the obvious. I'm dedicated to the Lord God. Not worried about what people say.
Being passionate makes it show that much more. Although, people translate my honesty into something more nefarious and evil. 

Which in turn brings me to say. God is all around me and even resides within and the only way to HIM is in Spirit and in truth. Being in the flesh. It's contrary to who HE is, and unless you come to learn that on your own, you will never understand where I'm coming from.  
I see him show his face -to me- by sending me dimes to confirm what I've heard in the Spirit. To me, it's a little footprint of God saying I am here. I am with you. Putting God, in a nutshell, isn't easy unless it's a nutshell of love.

My life has taken many adventurous roads which leaves a lot to talk about. One blog post could never give you The Most High. Only the WORD can do that. 

But I do feel as if it can help people to see and think of him more. Hopefully anyways, through my posts, people can see him more clearly or maybe even think of him more often than not. Maybe learn to apply real world situations to HIS Word which causes them to make different choices. Instead of going the way the world taught.

As for me. I'm human too and needed to ensure myself that I'm plugged into my source. This is why I'd asked for a sign one day and HE gave me a dime. He still gives me dimes at the same moments I need reassurance most.  

Today, I found two, and some days, I find none. But because of his intricate timing, and my awareness of such, I know he is with me always. 

If any of that makes sense! That's just a little insight into who I am and a minute portion of who God Almighty is to me. 

Repent and show love to your neighbor. If you've not accepted Yeshuah, Christ Jesus as your savior, better gets to it!  The only way back to the Father is JESUS who is THE WRITTEN WORD OF GOD. Let no man deceive you. Let the WORD light your path! 

Time is running out!